Learn to Drive!!
As a regular commuter on one of the busiest roads in the Sydney Metro area, the M4 Motorway, as well as my occupation allowing me to see some of the......more interesting ways that people drive, I feel that I am suitably qualified to say a few things about drivers.
When I say drivers, I mean the person who drives his/her vehicle in peak times.
In general, they cannot drive!!
Seriously folks, a straight peice of road, approximately 30km in length, no lights, 3 lanes (for most of it)....why the fuck then do we come to a complete fucking stand still? Not to mention that these drivers usually are on this road EVERY day, you would think after a while that they would learn.
1. SUNGLASSES. Unless you have been smacked around the ears so many times that you are completely fucking stupid, the sun rises in the
East and goes down in the West. Penrith is in the west and the city is in the east. That means you will be driving into the sun. WEAR SOME FUCKING SUNGLASSES!!. Next time you are on the motorway, have a look how many people don't and as you come around to drive into the sun, watch their reactions. The first thing you see is the squinting of the eyes, followed by the jerking of the head, followed by the automated reaction of slowing down and braking. $20 at any Quicky Mart in the city will get you a pair of UV protection sunnys imbecile.
2. MAKEUP. Ladies and Metros, mirrors in vehicles are not designed for you to apply your makeup.
3. NEWSPAPERS. When you are driving, put the paper down, listen to the radio instead you gimp, they say the same things anyway.
4. LANE JUMPERS. It is because of these cocks trying to get ahead that causes others behind to brake as they squeeze their fat ass into a hole not even big enough to piss in. It is usually the case that they will get ahead in one lane but then that lane will eventually stop and you end up back near them again.
5. COURTESY. When you are in the lane that
also merges, how hard is it to let one car in, you go, another car gets in behind you, and so on. No, fucking selfish drivers just keep driving, usually even as the lane ends and they drive in the breakdown lane just to squeeze in one car ahead then the person in front of them.
6. SLOW DOWN PARTNER!. Christ, how much slower can you go? What is wrong in pacing yourself with the car in front, not going fast, nearly running up their ass then braking and causing a gap a mile long. Idiot!
Christ!! This spray could go on, but I have now vented. Surely there are more characteristics I have not identified. Please comment on them and let us all know what to keep a look out for whilst driving on our roads.
When I say drivers, I mean the person who drives his/her vehicle in peak times.
In general, they cannot drive!!
Seriously folks, a straight peice of road, approximately 30km in length, no lights, 3 lanes (for most of it)....why the fuck then do we come to a complete fucking stand still? Not to mention that these drivers usually are on this road EVERY day, you would think after a while that they would learn.
1. SUNGLASSES. Unless you have been smacked around the ears so many times that you are completely fucking stupid, the sun rises in the
East and goes down in the West. Penrith is in the west and the city is in the east. That means you will be driving into the sun. WEAR SOME FUCKING SUNGLASSES!!. Next time you are on the motorway, have a look how many people don't and as you come around to drive into the sun, watch their reactions. The first thing you see is the squinting of the eyes, followed by the jerking of the head, followed by the automated reaction of slowing down and braking. $20 at any Quicky Mart in the city will get you a pair of UV protection sunnys imbecile.2. MAKEUP. Ladies and Metros, mirrors in vehicles are not designed for you to apply your makeup.
3. NEWSPAPERS. When you are driving, put the paper down, listen to the radio instead you gimp, they say the same things anyway.
4. LANE JUMPERS. It is because of these cocks trying to get ahead that causes others behind to brake as they squeeze their fat ass into a hole not even big enough to piss in. It is usually the case that they will get ahead in one lane but then that lane will eventually stop and you end up back near them again.
5. COURTESY. When you are in the lane that
also merges, how hard is it to let one car in, you go, another car gets in behind you, and so on. No, fucking selfish drivers just keep driving, usually even as the lane ends and they drive in the breakdown lane just to squeeze in one car ahead then the person in front of them.6. SLOW DOWN PARTNER!. Christ, how much slower can you go? What is wrong in pacing yourself with the car in front, not going fast, nearly running up their ass then braking and causing a gap a mile long. Idiot!
Christ!! This spray could go on, but I have now vented. Surely there are more characteristics I have not identified. Please comment on them and let us all know what to keep a look out for whilst driving on our roads.
posted by Waz! | 9:52 AM
6 Comments:
What is it with the dickheads that race past the queues to exit off Northern, Mulgoa, Russell St’s and then try to force their way in at the ramp, stopping in the left lane and causing all sorts of mayhem for the traffic trying to go further on?
And the crayon eaters that want to do less than 80k in the 110k sections of the M4. FFS there is a perfectly serviced and reasonably clear highway that runs parallel to the M4 that would be perfect for you fuck heads traveling to the Country Kitchen Buffet, or whose vehicles are so un- road worthy that any speed over 60km will cause it to collapse into a bigger pile of shit than it already is. !
I find that ½ a house brick to the bonnet / windscreen of these morons, as I drive by, goes someway towards making this problem a little easier to live with.
I guess it’s lucky that we don’t have easy access to guns!!!
I agree wholeheartedly Gentlemen!!! Fucking crayon eaters in the fast lane AAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!Wazza, is there any chance we can introduce some legislation where capital punishment is offered to these monumentally annoying cunts??? FFS!!!!!!!!
Believe me, if they allowed me to implement legislation it would look at little something like Escape from New York except put every fuckwit into Tasmania and blow any prick who tried to slip back into Oz out of the water.
Well done!
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