Abracadabra Freddie

BRAD Fittler revealed yesterday how he read about his promotion to Roosters head coach in the newspaper last weekend - not in the sports section but in the stars.

Just a day after being appointed Chris Anderson's succesor at Bondi, Fittler told how his destiny unfolded in The Sunday Telegraph's weekly stars column.

The Aquarian openly told players and Roosters staffers how astrology guru Jonathan Cainer's deadly accurate predictions for his birthsign came to fruition on Monday night, when Anderson fell on his sword.

"In some ways you are going beyond and above the call of duty,'' Fittler was told. "In others you are hearing duty's call so loud it's deafening. The strange thing is duty is not actually making a mumur.
"What you are hearing is the echo of responsibility.'' An amazed Fittler said yesterday: "It was freaky, spot on. I can't stop thinking about it.''

Responsibility came calling louder than ever yesterday, with Fittler leading the Roosters on his first-ever training session as coach at a team camp in Kiama.

I predict that Freddie has started coaching now, because he can't be blamed for the roosters being complete fucking losers and losing the rest of their games this year. Maybe he can reshuffle their positions with a Ouija Board and get Harry Potter to be the team doctor, or get a witch-doctor to put a curse on the opposition so they play like the roosters do.